NURU Massage GURU. How To Please Nude Girlfriend GF or BF With Naked Relaxing Massage Technique NOT

Ginny, I was watching that relationship Guru, who knows nothing about women, because he never saw one. But I learned from one very important thing from him that women do not actually care about sex and no matter how hard you try to impress her in bed, you will be just another average for her. But there is a one sure way to impress your girl in bed. It’s a good erotic or even nuru massage. Yes, Ginny today we will learn it. While they preparing and showing we can talk. You know if you watch our channel that I have that hot blond girl friend who is a Australopithecus, I mean Nordic Alien in Australia and next month I am going there again. So here is what we shall learn today. And once we gain that ancient knowledge of seductive massage, she will be like so impressed like no man ever impressed her. She knows that I am studying hard for her and for that she promised to send her dance in pink panties tomorrow so you also can see it tomorrow on our channel. Now lets watch carefully and learn and you too watch with us, it’s going to be good because I bought this DVD on highly reviewed junkyard sale in Oakland and it’s called: Erotic Massage for Imbeciles. Yes, that junk yard had two reviews one from local raccoon, telling it’s always good there and the other one from an alien space traveler who bought some white substance there that let him fly to the stars and time travel. Yeah, he called it Light Speed Drive – LSD if I am not mistaken. And if that alien was able to fly to the stars, surely we can master a couple of simple massage technique, it’s not a rocket science, right?
OK, lets watch attentively. See what are they doing? Looks like then done with pre massage showering and now started massaging.
They apply some spray. That’s Good I have spay too. Lot’s of it in this red can.
Hmm. Black gloves. It’s looks like she is working on dead body in the morgue. I don’t think my girlfriend will like it, lets move to the next one.
This one is good and looks nice foot massage she will surely like it. Let’s watch attentively. It might the technique we need to learn. Wait what’s this? Looks like something from alien movie that they use in UFO for alien probing, I also don’t think that she will enjoy probing that much and I don’t have this equipment.
This is something different. I think I have the right equipment for that one. Looks like the right tool. Wait, do I need to stick it were? Really? Such a strange technique. Never saw one before.
And this one. Do they actually cut the bacon. It looks like a cooking show. At least I have the right tool for this kind of massage.
Let’s watch something safer. It looks like broom. I have it. We should remember who to do it.
Aga I have those tools too. Can do. It’s probably for back repair. Looks like it fit for cyborg. Is my girlfriend a cyborg? No she is a Nordic alien. Maybe it will not work on her.
Here what is this a snail? Where do I find snail. Ginny I remember you found snail once. Where I can get it? Ah I remember in the backyard near the shed. It’s so cool imagine. She is all relaxed and I suddenly unleashing snails on her naked body. Sounds so exciting. I am sure she will appreciate it a lot.
Snake massage. It’s even cooler than snails. Ginny where is that snaked you killed 5 years ago. Do you still have it? No that’s a beetle. Is there are any beetle massage. See we don’t even know. We have so much to learn. Where is that snake Ah, here it is! All we need to do is to revive it and now we have all the tools for the massage.
Look at this. What brown substance they use is it? Is that what I think it is. Looks disgusting. How can they even tough it? Yes I think that what I think it is. Nutella! And so shall we learn sticky massage technique lets watch for a minute. OK, let’s skip to the next one.
Looks like they are implementing sucking technique. Yes Ginny, you are right this suction technique. But it still sucks. Well I don’t have those suction cups. But I have a suction device. I hope I can please my girlfriend with it but it leaves mark on the skin. Maybe is a new fashion trend. What do you think. And what our viewers thinks? Please, comment about your massage experience, don’t hold back.
And now they are using so sophisticated equipment. We need month to master it’s operation. So much to lean and so little time. Well, I hope after watching this video you will more skeptical listening various internet gurus and using your own head instead of blindly following them. Better read my books. They bring knowledge. For example, Illuminati Secret Knowledge: Future Beyond Your Wildest Dreams and subscribe to the channel to find out more essential and vital information for your survival in 21st century steel and concrete jungle.


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